Wednesday, September 16, 2009

The First Shall Be The Last! ....Lets hope so!

A note to readers: dx=diagnose  sx=sympton & A.D.D.=AD/HD(childhood and adult)

Q: What does the title of this post, have to do with A.D.D.?

A: The bumpy road that led to my dx of A.D.D..Before, after, and the disease's in between.

I will begin at the "In between", kinda like I read a book(lol).> When I was in my early 40's, I was living by myself after a divorce in 2001 (18 yr.'s married), and realized that I had not been sick(flu,cold,fever etc.) in over 10 yr.s.!  I thought I was invincable! I even bragged about it, and had no fear about what I would eat,drink,smoke...etc. But I was lonely, and needed something that I thought I would never find. I tryed, but it always turned out the same>lonely.

Then a couple yr.'s later(I'm not good with remembering dates,yr.'s,..etc..) I met Carolyn, (my wonerfull wife now)! She saved my life(you will see)by loving me, and giving me the ability to have the kind of  love I was searching for.>Me knowing I am in love, and being loved. Not with words, but with truth and open honesty. She called my bluff, so to speak, and layed her own cards on the table(and still does)! That could be another long post, so I will skip to a couple yr.'s later.

I still had not been "sick", and had stopped drinking shortly after we met(was'nt hard to do) and have'nt had a drink in over 7 yr.'s, or even wanted one. That's a good thing, because if I had a drink today, I would most likely die within a few hr.'s from the mixture of all the presribed meds I take to stay alive. Ironic is an word to desribe much of my life(lol). Now, on to main subject...I went to see our family Dr. (my wife made me..lol) for a complete exam, blood work and all. Not because I was sick, but we have good ins. provider,(have payed alot of $'s over the yr.'s) and I had'nt seen a Dr. in 15 yr.'s. Evrythings Okie Dokie,,lungs,heart,B.P. a little high,but I was 20 lb.s overweight at the the time, so no prob,,,,until lab results showed Type2 diabetes. Ok then, I started meds(metformin 1nce a day),whatched my carbs, lost 20 lb.s(5'11" 170 lb.s)in about 6mo.s. Everythings fine. Skip to summer 2006.

Go to Dr.(my wife made me,again(lol). Speech probs,word finding probs(always have had word finding stuff a little,but was more noticeable that summer)R-hand motor skills. So go get MRI. .....This is one date I will always remember> Aug.18,2006, 9:00 A.M.,  Norman Regional Hospital, I had an MRI of my brain. Later that day, I received a call on my cell phone @ 2:53 P.M.. Nurse calls and said: "Dr. Harrolsen asked me to call you and tell you, he has the results of your MRI, and wants to go over them with you today, before 4:30." Of course I asked if there was some promblem with the MRI,and so on. She only said: "Scott, I can only tell you that Dr. Harrolsen realy needs to see you today." I could tell by the sound of her voice, that I probably had something wrong with me. I felt fine that day, so I figured it was just something he saw, that he wanted to test my reflexes or something, like he did at my 1st appt. before MRI.

I was'nt that far away from the Dr.'s office that day. I just was, by chance, installing some doors & storm doors at a customers house, about 20 min.s away, whith my dad. So I decided to go ahead and finish the door I was working on. About 5 min.s after the nurse called, I called my wife, and told her my plans, and what the nurse said (not exactly...just I was asked to go see the Dr.).  Well, she(my wife) knows how I am about things, and she said: "I'm clocking out now, and I will meet you there, and you need to stop whatever you are doing, and go now Scott! I am serious, please just go now, your dad can finish whatever your doing!"  And she was right about that, so I told dad, and he said the same thing Carolyn said, only louder(lol).

I got to the Dr.'s office, and waited in my truck, and lit a cig. while I waited for Carolyn to get there. While I sat there thinking about why the Dr. wanted to talk to me so soon after MRI, a very calm feeling embraced me(best way I can explain this feeling). And I just knew that my life was going to change that day. And I knew I was ready and able to overcome anything that was getting ready to happen. This is the Gods Honest Truth, what I just wrote about that moment in the parking lot of our Dr.'s office. I had never had, nor probably never will again feel the serenity, that I had,  for that brief moment in my life. That's not relevent to this post though. So, I will stay on subject in the next paragraph.

We sat down in the Dr.'office, and he said he had no better way to tell us, than to just tell us the MRI shows at least 12 tumors, and pointed out the largest one, above & behind the left ear. Carolyn was obviously trying to keep her emotions under control. I only asked the Dr. if I needed to maybe get some tests at a hospital in the near future. He rested his hand on Carolyn's shoulder, and looked me in the eye, and said: "I have already registered you, and you have a room at Norman Regional Hospital ready for you now Scott. If you need to go home and get some things, then you should go now. I know this is hard for both of you, if you need someone to take you or drive..." I stopped him there and said we will be fine, and just give us the information we need when we get to the hospt....etc.

So far, this post has only shown the road we traveled in a personal way. I will publish this on my blog now, but I will continue and write more about the diseases that are not A.D.D.,..... what Gina Pera (the person that has helped me the most, in understanding A.D.D.) calls "Traveling Companions" that I have. I have only two dx'ed traveling companions. I have learned, there are many more diseases, syndromes,,,etc. That are traveling companions with  other  people that also have A.D.D..  I would like to learn and write more posts on that subject in the future. For now, I will keep adding more info. on this post, until I am satified I have given my best way of explaining the title of it.

I'll make this short,and get to final dx as quick as I can..... I went through every test known, and the final result was, I needed a brain biospy. We had to find a neurosurgean, and thats not as easy as it sounds. Finnaly a step cousin, who was a patholgist at Mercy Hospt. in OK. City. was able to get me an appt. with Dr. Reynolds. A very highly respected N.S.. Who did a biospy on the least dangerous tumor on my r-frontal lobe. I will skip to My present Dr. and the words on my first dx.(I have copies of everything)

IMPRESSION: Mr. Hutson has been a diagnostic dilemma as he clearly has significant evindence of inflammatory disease in his brain, a brain biopsy was not particularly helpful, showing just chronic inflammatory, with no identifying features. The characteristics of the lesions in the brain MRI are not entirely typical for multiple sclerosis given the diffuse nature of them and the predominant juxtacortical location. (some other stuff blah blah....) He goes on with...With all that being said and having looked for other explanations, it does appear that Mr. Hutson has probable multiple sclerosis, albeit with an atypical clinical and MRI presentation. That was 11/02/06.

 I will just tell the treaments up to now>Rebif44, cytoxin chemo once a mo. for 6 mo.'s, ...Then I had a series of complex partial seizures for a few mo.s, which led to generalized tonic clonic seizure(Gran Mal, a biggy) ICU because of excessive hypertention with the seizure, twice in 1 week -2/28/07 was the 1st......later on, an all day Neuropsychological evaluation by Dr. William Ruwe, and a dx. of A.D.D.....Lots more stuff in between M.S. dx and A.D.D. dx, But A.D.D. dx. was about 2 yrs. ago. And so, I will explain more later in this post, but right now, my eyes are gettin perty tired......

Eyes are rested now.......The reason for the neuropsych. exam.,written in my reports, was (keep in mind, Carolyn goes w/me to my neuro. appt.s(M.S.): July 24th 2007..  "Mrs. Hutson reports that Scott has become increasingly confused and forgetful. She states that this has been increasing in severity over the last four months, noting numerous occasions where Scott will walk into a room and forget why he is there, needing assistance from Mrs. Hutson. "(I think that is a bit over-dramatic, but.....)

Moving on to 2/18/09.....Next neuro. aptt. >(I will only write about A.D.D. dx stuff in the report).  "Dr. William Ruwe, who made numerous recommendations, in his report. This report was reviewed by Dr. Pardo and myself (my M.S. Dr. and David Dube, PA-C) prior to Mr. Hutson's visit, and we will discuss the findings and make our recommendations at this time." ..........Ok now I've gotten to the A.D.D. dx......Dr. Ruwe said I am A.D.D., and most likely have always been. Thats what he saw in my tests, and also from interveiw(questions about me and what she knows about my past) with Carolyn while I was testing.  And talking with me after testing.(He saw right through me, and my way of  "Acting like I'm a  normal guy". I realize now.)

So heres the explanation for the title:"The First Shall Be The Last" >It looks to me like, I was born A.D.D.. And along the way I picked up these "Traveling Companions" that only served to increase(make more obviuos)the sx's of A.D.D.  So let's hope the A.D.D. is the last disease I get. It was the first..............I will use a quote from ....Job, 42.12>  "So the Lord blessed the latter end of Job more than his begining"(even though I am no where even close to being perfect, like Job. I just like the book.)

Scott Thomas Hutson .....Born September 24th 1960-----

7 comments:

  1. WOW! Okay, ready and waiting for the next installment, whenever it arrives, thank you for sharing this journey...

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  3. .... okay... just goes to show me... I aint that bad after all... there is always someone that has had it worse.. ( no sympathy... but empathy) LOL
    Tonya.. (thaks for the link) :)

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  4. Tonya,

    Thank you! For the comment. I hope that "someone" is me, that has had it worse. You are speaking the truth when you say:"There is always someone that has had it worse.."

    I think you can see that I am not wanting sympathy. I hope everybody can see that. Sympathy is something I don't want. I would much rather be seen as a surviver that is willing to fight anything, and not wallow in self pity.

    I invite you to tell your own story here! I understand if you don't want to. Or if you have a blog or website...etc. feel free, and say or do anything you want to here! Only reason I moderate is to make sure no other comment'ers are pesonaly attacked. It's okay to attack me though, I am always right about everything, so it's not a prob.LOL haha. I'm also a bit goofy.

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  5. Scott,

    I cannot, for the life of me, imagine what you have gone through and I realize that ADD must be the least of your diagnosis, at this time, even though I am sure long before when you were undiagnosed it was possibly the most. However, rarely have I read something which is so inspiring and gives hope to others. I mean, man, the attitude that comes through your writing touches me and although I feel like I can put words into everyday language that has meaning, feeling and desire, dude, it just doesn't compare. You have blown me away and I wish you the absolute best.

    I do not consider myself a religious person per se; however, I do believe in faith, love and the human spirit and you have all of it in spades! How you do it… I don’t know, but I would like to know. Maybe your quote at the end explains your attitude? Your quote at the end touched me and has meaning which many of us can appreciate. I will definitely think on this for quite some time.

    You have my thoughts and prayers, bests,

    Bryan

    PS: I am frequently around wounded soldiers who come back in terrible conditions, most of which I don’t think I could survive, and somehow most of them have an attitude that is similarly inspiring and when I talk to them I realize that if I feel bad about myself and my situations, then I feel quite the idiot – nothing I have ever experience compares to what they have endured and in such a short time. I live very close to where ALL of our wounded soldiers come through… For a while I worked PR for the company I work for and I guided VIP’s to the IC ward to meet the wounded. It’s painful to meet them at first and yet, you just wouldn’t believe… and I guess they kind of rub off on me, like you have now. Sometimes people (me included and not to take anything away from personal struggles with ADD or ADHD) just don’t realize how good they have it until… hope that made sense

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  6. Bryan, Thank You!, And it makes alot of sense!

    I admire your commitment to helping our wounded Soldiers, and others with A.D.D./AHHD.


    I have talked to other people, that were receiving Chemo. when I was being treated with Chemo. There seams to be a commen bond, about the thoughts we all had when first DX. with whatever we have. A streangth that was inside, that was not there before. I am not strong, but I must take what streangth, I found, and not give up.

    Your comment just adds to my streangth Bryan, and your listening to wounded Soldiers is, I beleive in my heart, adding to they're streangth!

    Scott.

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  7. Scott,
    A very moving article (s)by you...I believe that there are no mistakes in Christian lives...God will direct and guide you...Your strenght is incredible...Ron

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